Healthy Discussion

In my studying this past week I've come across an idea and found it truly lacking....even within myself. I'm amazed at our inability to have healthy discussions and conversations. There is no equal ground of sharing thoughts. Instead, we find ourselves quick to take offense, make a point, and shut down any door in another's mind that was beginning to open and explore an idea, a thought, or even simply express a feeling. Instead we say by our actions, "No, don't think that. Don't go there. Stop it. Don't change. Don't rock the boat." In our quick response, we may not realize that we are shutting down the power within us and within each other. Thinking is powerful. As we know, homeostasis is more comfortable and change can be hard.

Now, you may be thinking that I'm being extreme here, but I saw it in myself. Even as I tried to open a discussion. I was quick to take offense. I shut down the conversation. And, I was wrong. It left hurt feelings on multiple sides. Hopefully, I was able to continue the conversation and heal the hurt that started, but I cannot know where it left the other people involved. But I do know, I continued the conversation after I thought about it more and tried to move it passed that point. I moved passed that point. And I hope the others involved continued sharing their thoughts and asking questions until they were able to move passed that point.

The quote I heard, shared and attempted to spark a conversation with, "It's a win-win as we have conversations with people who are different from us." Through those conversations we all become stronger. Our thoughts evolve, our behavior evolves. Understanding can grow if we seek to understand. We all have different perspectives. These glasses through which we view the world need adjusted. As anyone who wears glasses knows, the only way for the glasses to be adjusted is to share what the world looks like from where we are, the person helping us, then adjusts the glasses and we try them on again. This cycle of response and feedback continues until the owner of the glasses is satisfied with their view.

So, friends, I am welcoming discussion in my life. More of it. And hopefully more healthy discussion where I am less likely to take offense, more likely to understand the the view of those around me, and hopefully adjust my own glasses through the process.